CONFESSION #13: When it comes to my art and creative work, I don't like to fail.
The other day, the Lord put an idea for a short video into my head. It involved drawn animation, something I haven't dabbled in for a while, but the idea excited me. So I started thinking more about this idea, fleshing it out, thinking through how I could make it effective.
As I started thinking about it more, my stomach sank. I enjoy drawing, but I haven't actually practiced drawing in a long time. An idea that was exciting and new was quickly squashed by the lies of inability and inadequacy that I started to believe. The fear of failure held my idea captive.
This happens to a lot of us. We feel inspired and encouraged and all of a sudden our hope and inspiration are squashed by the fear of failure. This happens with art, creativity, school work, sports, in relationships, you name it. We fear failing, and it keeps us from taking risks, from trying.
As the fear of failure tried to derail my idea, the Lord reminded me of a truth. I am set free from the fear of failure, in all areas of life, thanks to the work of Jesus on the cross.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
In Psalm 73, King David talks about his failures, how he is prone to fall and fail. But, he also talks about how God is faithful and how God is with him David despite how he fails and messes up.
The same goes for me and for those that put their faith in God. We may mess up and fail in this life and spiritually, but God is always with us, and God never fails. I might fail artistically, but that's okay. God doesn't fail.
Ultimately, I am free to fail, because Jesus didn't fail. He went willingly to the cross, died a death he didn't deserve, and rose from the grave three days later, overcoming death.
My success doesn't come from my art or anything in this world. My success comes from the person of Jesus Christ, and that frees me from the fear of failure.
Despite my nagging fears, I am working on that animation video. And hopefully it works out, but if it doesn't, that's okay.
(P.S. I definitely plan on sharing the animation video when I finish it, regardless of how it turns out, but below is a sneak peak. It's a beginning concept sketch, and the pinky finger looks weird, but that's okay.)
This post is part of a 31 day series called Confessions of a Creative Christian.
Welcome! I'm Madi, a laughter-loving, movie-going, spontaneous-dancing, follower of Christ. Join me as I seek glimpses of God's grace in the ordinary and everyday.
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